Keep Growing

5:11 AM Posted In , , , , , Edit This 0 Comments »
My mind is running on anything but empty, but every time i try and pour myself on paper the ink runs dry. I can't seem to find what it is that's haunting my mind. Everything is running in circles and I'm getting lost in the loop.

Wash, Rinse, Repeat. Everything seems to be breaking itself down into its simplest form but I'm resisiting change.

"Your tongue is a rudder that steers the whole ship" but my mouth has been closed for days. I'm drifting in between thought and dream. Sometimes life gets going so fast that you get lost in the inertia. You'd think living on a boat would slow things down, but it doesn't at all.

I'm moving faster than ever but all I want to do is stop. Rewind. Backtrack. Your heart is a record stuck going in circles singing out the sweetest of melodies, the saddest of songs.

I'm tired of people being mean. I just don't understand the concept. I'm tired of being on the receiving end of every bad intention gone horribly right. I'm tired of being a punching bag just because I'm strong enough to stand the bruises. I'm tired of taking other peoples losses on my shoulders when no one will take mine.

Sometimes my optimism is a curse. Instead of disliking others I just end up mad at myself wishing I could be angry, wishing I could stoop down to that level and just tell everyone to go away. But I'm incapable of disliking a person. I'm incapable of not-forgiving. Maybe that's a good thing.

Except it seems to run against everything everyone else believes in.

Still there are days where I walk
With my ear to the ground so I can hear the earth pound
Out her faint pulse that's echoed in six billion heartbeats
But I am still confounded by the fact
That I'm surrounded by a sea of faces
Crowned in scorn

I want to tell them
Love is never the color of blood.
It's blue like the life pumping inside you,
like the sky echoing above you.
Love is not red because red is the color of stop
and love is always on GO.
There's no slowing down no cautionary thoughts.
I've never heard of a love where you only give a part of your heart.
You give it all.

And sometimes it gets broken.

Sometimes you get so hurt and torn open
that your soul can seep out of the cracks.
You just have to remember that it may be December
but it's summer on the other side of the world.
So plow yourself open and move yourself to grow
lnto the brightest star you've ever seen
Into the vision that makes up the best dream you've ever had
And then, keep dreaming it.

And if you fall, fall knowing
That someone is making a wish on you
Fall knowing that a million faces are watching
and waiting and praying on you

Fall knowing your going to climb up again
Fall knowing that sometimes you fall at the start but you keep running
Sometimes you fall off the swing but you get back on and keep jumping
Sometimes you fall flat on your face in a front of a crowd
But your heart will keep thumping

So start conducting the beat of your life
Because life is a symphony where the high notes
Are laughter and the low notes
The beginnings to happily ever afters
So stop waiting and start playing

Because even in autumn beauty occurs
You drive to New England and see the trees unfurl
The pearls of their soul in red, orange, and yellow

So don't stop now, keep going
If your stuck in a storm, keep rowing
If the walls starting growing around you, start mowing the down
Because life is too short to let someone else box you in
So glue your eyes to the sky and listen

Sometimes cruelty is the giver of what you need most
Sometimes love is a parasite and your body’s the host
Sometime your world has to flood, you save what you need
Get on the boat till the waters recede
Leaving the ground ten-thousand times more fertile
Than it ever was before.

Tonight, I'm a wildflower growing on the side of a mountain
Naked and lonely with my heart exposed to the sun
Waiting for the rain to come find me
So I can grow and become the beauty
That a hiker finds and will treasure
So much he'll want to pick me
But he knows I need me roots in the soil
So I can keep blooming

I want to be loved like that
Loved so much you can't measure.

Tomorrow I'm the penny thrown into a fountain
That you made your wish on.
But don't go home and wait for me to come true
Come and find me, I've already started looking for you.


Pretty good for a half hour...
Work Time

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